“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him”. (James 1:12 ESV)
The Lord had laid this on my heart to continue to address and shine light on this subject of giving up offenses. So when a person gets a message to share, note that they are the first partaker. Ouch.
Jesus was offended by the very people He died trying to save. From the pulpit to the door we are either the offender or the offended. Just because a person attends church and reads the Bible, does not mean that they are living for Christ. Look at the fruit that falls from their tree.
We have to learn to separate the deed of offense from the person. We cannot get caught up on titles. Each person is a child of God. We are all human and make mistakes. Whatever the offender said or did, we must give it to God. Jesus loved them enough to die on a cross for them just as much as He died on the cross for you or me. “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you”. (John 15:18 ESV)
We must remember that what the offender did to you is not about you. You were just
convenient for them to vomit on. You cannot change what they did to you, but you do have control over your reaction to the injustice. You may never get an apology. The offender has moved on in their life and you are still stuck, But God. God can turn this situation around, but He needs you to surrender your right to the offense. You have to cry out to the Lord for help. This a battle in the spiritual realm between God and the evil one, you and I just happen to be in the middle.
Let the Lord fight your battles. You don’t have to allow anyone to walk all over you. Always treat people with respect, but don’t become a doormat. Set boundaries. You are not weak because you do not respond outwardly to an injustice. Take everything to the Lord in prayer. As a matter of fact, the Lord makes you strong in what appears to be your weakness. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.” (Exodus 14:14 ESV)
We must try to see the offender through the eyes of God. God is Love. If we are honest with ourselves, when we are offended, we rehearse the offense over and over in our mind. Because we know that we are right in the situation, our thoughts take over and the next thing we know, the offense has taken hold in our soul. The offense has taken root. Do not continue to water the offense with thoughts and words. You must put the word of God on the situation and make positive confessions daily. The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance”. (2 Peter 3:9 ESV)
Choose to give the offense to the Lord. We do not want to ruin our relationship with the Lord because of unforgiveness. All of this is not easy to do alone. We need the help of the Holy Spirit.
Pray, search me Oh Lord. Get into my nooks and crannies and take out of me anything that keeps this door of offense open. Don’t let the offense take root in my life. Lord, I need your help to renounce this offense from my heart.
Remember, our life is about Jesus. He needs us to do the work of the ministry. In this season, we need to get out and may have encounters with rude persons. Don’t take offense, immediately say Lord, I chose to give this situation over to you. Pray for the offender and move on. You may never see the change in that person, but you planted a seed. “ And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God”. (Romans 12:2)
Talk Yourself out of Being Offended. Immediately renounce the offense from your heart and begin to pray for the offender’s salvation. Every day that we allow the offense to manifest, it blocks our access to the Lord. Have compassion for the offender. Try to understand their mindset. Remember, the offense is not about you, but something lacking in the life of the offender. Practice Detachment from the situation. Do not let the offender see your full emotions. Be Humble and Love Truth more than Being Right. We must die to self and Overcome Self-Centeredness. Always reserve the right to judgment.
“Do not take to heart all the things that people say, lest you hear your servant cursing you. Your heart knows that many times you yourself have cursed others”. ( Ecclesiastes 7:21-22 ESV)
“Blessed are you when people hate you and when they exclude you and revile you and spurn your name as evil, on account of the Son of Man! Rejoice in that day, and leap for joy, for behold, your reward is great in heaven; for so their fathers did to the prophets. (Luke 6:22-23
ESV)
by Caroline Demby
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